Lyla Garrity:Born Again Ho

Thanks for choosing to waste your time with my waste of time. Welcome to the first post by Ned's younger brother (we miss you champ...In your eyes, no light no heat, your eyes....)

For those of us who are avid fans of the tv show Friday Night Lights, we have met a great disappointment in this second season of the show. It has been incredibly hard to take a show seriously when it takes such a turn for hypocrisy like it has in the first two episodes.

One of the main story lines last year included the star quarterback getting paralyzed from the waist down and his girlfriend sleeping with his best friend while he recovered because she is that much of a whore and wanted more than just the occasional oral sesh from Street, the former qb.



If you look to the left you'll see the famous scene where Street is being scolded for trying to play the old "Switcharoo" with Lyla. She had just found out the hard way that he was not in fact fully recovered, and that although they are delicious and refreshing - firecracker popsicles do NOT double as sex toys. You really can't blame him though, he couldn't satisfy the whore so he had to try an unconventional method.



Let's sit back and juxtapose this storyline from last season with the new season. Granted NBC is trying to pump up female viewership by having more "OC" like story lines, but is it really worth it to lose your male (aka more important) viewers?? Anyway, this season, Lyla W. Garrity (the W stands for Whore in case you're slow on the uptake) has decided to become a born again Christian, which, if we were in the real world, would be just about as likely as Britney ever getting custody of her kids back. Now lets just be honest with ourselves, sadly Lyla W. never had a chance of breaking out of her genetic mold of sluttery. Let's examine someone who is near and dear to her persona...her father Buddy Garrity.



Just look at what a dirtbag this guy is, where are his eyes looking in this picture?? Stop checking out your 17 year old daughter's chest Buddy! No wonder his wife left him, I bet he insisted on giving Lyla a bath until she was 16 years old. "Come on Lyla, let me give you something that Street can't anymore." Oh and shocker, he had an affair with the mother of the other town whore last season.


Then, there is her mother. Granted she is playing the role of victim in the Garrity divorce, however that does not excuse her of having a new guy move in with her and her family just a couple months after Buddy moved out. This makes me start to believe that she had a little something on the side going when she and Buddy were still together. Because honestly, who would jump at the opportunity to be with a recently divorced mother of 3 with a psycho like Buddy Garrity most likely learing in your window nightly. Anyway, needless to say, much like the child of a crack whore living on the streets, Lyla Garrity never really had a fair shot at life, but that still does not excuse her behavior.

From the looks of things at the end of the second episode, Lyla W. will continue kneeling as she does at church, however when she looks up she won't be looking at the altar. Instead she'll be staring in the eyes of good old Tim Riggins.

Bottom line, if Lyla ever wants to make it out of Dillon and see the world, her best opportunity would probably be one of those hookers that live in the freight steerage like in season 2 of the Wire.